I was having a crappy day and next thing I knew, I put up a story talking about it on my Instagram. Not something I do often, or ever. Few hours later when I checked my direct messages on Instagram, I was swamped with texts from you guys. Some consoling, some heartwarming, and some resonating with the exact same crappy feeling. This made me realise that I’m always talking about/sharing my victories with you all but sometimes, maybe talking about my struggles as losses could help even one of you in some way. That – and all the questions I’ve been receiving on where Shailin is and why we aren’t together right now. You guys deserved an answer.
This is the current situation. Shailin works/lives in Belgium and here is what we had decided – I would come to Belgium right after our honeymoon (in March), settle my things and myself in my new part-home and then begin a journey of shuffling between India & Belgium so I could handle work and still get to be with my husband.
I would spend one month in Europe and then keep coming back to India for two weeks or so to execute my blogging projects and assignments. This was the plan for the first few years until we finally decided where we wanted to stay.
Legally how I would do this is – apply for a long stay visa (category D), so I could shuffle hassle-free between the two countries. This was the reason we had a court marriage last August (if you remember, from here). I started this process in August and after crazy amounts of documentation, was hoping for it to come through in January. It didn’t.
After our honeymoon, Shailin waited for a few weeks to see if my visa would finally come through and we could travel to kick-off this new beginning together. But it still didn’t. He had to take off without me. So much work had already been missed due to wedding planning, the wedding itself and then our honeymoon. I waited back in India.
Finally, I heard back on 5th April and my visa had been refused. The next few days were an absolute whirlwind and spent in nothing but panic mode. Was this a permanent refusal? What was the next step? A hundred other questions followed. Thankfully, it wasn’t a permanent no. There were ways we could try again. We figured out an alternative route and kickstarted paperwork for it. Officials said I could be with Shailin in less than two weeks. This wasn’t so bad, I thought to myself then. I get bonus time with my family and I could finish off some work while I was here too!
Unfortunately, since then, it’s been 2 months and 2 days and I still haven’t heard back.
Thankfully, I have work here in Mumbai to keep me busy and occupied but I miss him so much. You all know, we had been doing long distance for 5 years before our wedding and the most exciting part about getting married was to be able to FINALLY see each other EVERYDAY. He visited me a few weeks ago (remember this vlog?
) but he was barely in the city for 2 and a half days and he had to get back to work.
Some days I wake up feeling motivated, happy to have the opportunities I do, to be surrounded by my family and friends who I love SO much, and work towards making the most of my time here. Some mornings I just feel so low because I feel like my whole life is currently at a standstill, just ‘waiting’ on a legal document to come in, not knowing when I would finally get to see him again.
I’ve decided to be strong and be positive. I know in my heart, this is happening for a reason, either for me to pick up a learning or to come out stronger. Believing, that our love will get me through this.
Either ways, it was time I responded to your hundred texts about where Shailin was and why we weren’t together. Can’t thank you enough for checking in : ) In some way, venting out my feelings has made me feel better today.