I don’t specifically feel very positively about V-day but I have to admit, not having plans doesn’t go well down with me either. Shailin and I did years of long distance before we got married last year so we didn’t spend too many Valentine’s together but I would still make it a point to spend this overwehelming day with someone I love. Which brings me to a gratitude ritual I put together only last year. And you could do this with practically anyone that you’re spending Valentines day with, no restrictions on only romantic interests, be it your best friend, parents, siblings, grandparents, a group of friends, cousins, anyone!
I’m not the most creative when it comes to celebrations but this little regime made our typical dinner date last year sooooo much cuter, more ‘intense’ in the right ways, and one that left us genuinely feeling AMAZING about each other and our entire relationship. So here’s how you play!
Step 1. Take three pieces of paper to make three lists on. One each for A) Characteristics, B) Moments and C) Future Gratitude
Step 2. In the list (A) Characteristics: You write down the characteristics of your partner that you’re grateful for. You can jot down as many as your heart comes up with. When you love someone, you do love all of them, but what are those personal attributes that you are really really grateful for? Say – honesty, loyalty, their supportiveness, their humour, etc. It would also be fun to keep a timer and see who comes up with more meaningful ones in the given time frame.
Usually whenever I’m doing a Gratitude exercise, it’s somethingI do as an individual. But in this case, there’s somebody reciprocating it and saying thank you for YOU! And that is such a beautiful feeling to experience!
3. In list (B) Moments: Jot down the moments you’ve had together that you’re extremely grateful for. It could be elaborate moments or even simple conversations that meant something to you. My favorite part was hearing Shailin’s side because his answers were so different from mine! This not only helps you to understand your loved one so much better but also makes a beautiful trip down memory lane.
4. The list (C) Future Gratitude, is kinda like your Gratitude bucket list for the both of you! This is also my favorite part. So we set a limit of 8 things that we would mutually agree to add to this list. Write down the things or experiences that you would like to set as a goal to achieve and be grateful for, with this person. So it would read something like ‘I’m so thankful for having the most amazing, fun beach holiday with X’. Even though it hasn’t happened in reality, you are already giving thanks for it, giving out signals to the universe. This works like the law of attraction and this is my derivation from an exercise I read in the book, ‘The Secret’ by Rhonda Byrne. It could be something as momentous as marriage or having a rock solid relationship with or something as tiny as a day devoid of any arguments. Setting goals for oneself always helps. But have you ever thought of setting goals for yourself with your partner?
I believe that this exercise helps to rekindle double the love as both you and your partner consciously appreciate each other. Once you’ve made these lists, put them in a box or jar with a picture of the both of you and keep it aside. P.S: This box has been known to be the best balm to soothe out tiny fights! Whenever you’ve had a disagreement, have a look at this box and you’ll be reminded of the love you share!!!
If you decide to play this little game, please tell me below or over on my Instagram and don’t forget to share images with me – I would love love love to see them! It would also encourage me to do more such posts 🙂